Povey Prattle

A letter to the Times of London. Dear Sir, It has come to my attention that a game with the confusing name of “American Football” is gaining some popularity in our beloved and God-favoured England. It is a sign of our modern decadence. This game may well be American . It is most certainly not football : that skillful and glorious sport which was birthed by decent Englishmen on our noble English shores. In my day we engaged in the manly activities of Association Football, Rugby Football, Fox hunting, Hare coursing and Butler baiting.   Those superb English pastimes led to the creation of the typical English value of fairness.  They made us  great. The introduction of this so called “American Football” will lead to a decline in our morals, and a devaluation of all that is good and valuable in the English heritage of morality, deference to our "betters"  and respect for middle class values. True Englishmen will resist this with all their...

1.  If you leave your home in good time for an appointment, every traffic light is green. 2. If you are running late, every traffic light is red. 3. It is only after you have wound up the electric cord and toted your vacuum cleaner back to its storage place that you notice the places you did not vacuum. 4.The use of directionals/blinkers on your car is not to be recommended.  Should you use them it is more than likely that your tyres/tires will immediately deflate, your air bags deploy, and your chain drive disintegrate.  This is a well known fact in Florida. 5.  Should you take the risk of using directional/blinkers keep them on at all times in order to confuse the driver behind you.  Alternatively you might signal right or left at an intersection, but then go straight ahead to annoy the driver behind you. This practice is  recommended by the Department of Motor Vehicles in Florida. 6. Your windows, mirrors and sliding glass door...

2014 is turning out to be a great year so far,

A county ordinance prohibits the sale of alcoholic beverages for on-site consumption on properties within 800 feet of an established (school) or church in the unincorporated area of Sarasota County, calling such practice “a threat to the health, safety, morals and general welfare of the public.” Commentary.  Is the  threat to the health, safety, morals and general welfare of the public.” a danger to the Church, or to the place which sells alcoholic beverages. Think about it! Tongue in cheek   jmp

"Every one will say horse shit smells like flowers if they want to be popular with a horse's ass" (From "The Lacuna" by Barbara Kingsolving (Harper 2009).   I am not sure if this is a genuine Mexican proverb, or one created by the author for her book.

The fundamental cause of trouble in the world is that the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt." - Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)     "Don't be so humble - you are not that great." - Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat   "Sex and religion are closer to each other than either might prefer." - Saint Thomas More (1478-1535)   "People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)   "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)     "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." - Martin Luther King Jr. (1929-1968)   "Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'." - Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)     All via Dr. Gabrie...