Thursday, 2 February 2017

British huma

Via Pam B.   The Jester is British Comedian Ronnie Corbett (Dec'd)


It is rumoured that the publishers have recalled the long-awaited book on the history of Scotch Tape
Apparently, no one can find the beginning.

Complaints were made following the annual chefs' fancy dress ball last night. A woman dressed only in gooseberries and cream made an improper suggestion to a man dressed in cake and sherry.
She made a proper fool of herself and he got a trifle excited.

A grandfather has gone missing after eating four cans of baked beans, two cauliflowers and a jar of gherkins.
His family have made an emotional appeal for him not to come home for at least a fortnight.

There has been some good news for the burglar who fell inside a combine harvester while on the run last week.
His family said he'll soon be out on bale.

The sad news is that the funeral took place today of Mr Spenser P. Dobson, a famous compiler of crossword puzzles.
   After a short service, he was buried 6 down and 3 across.

The BBC canteen has seen better days. These days, they're having to resort to cheap gimmicks to drum up trade. Their recent one was three curries for the price of one ... so you got a good run for your money.

A cement mixer has collided with a prison van.
      Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.

One of the weathermen has just become a father.
The baby is said to be fine, with occasional drizzle later in the day.

The first school I ever went to was a pretty soft school.
At St Pansy's Primary, you could have a reign of terror with a balloon on a stick while we were paying protection money to the Brownies.

After a series of crimes in the Glasgow area, Chief Inspector McTavish has announced that he's looking for a man with one eye. 
                If he doesn't find him, he's going to use both eyes.

And now a message from the police in Finchley.
There's bad news about the two rabbits stolen from Peter's Petshop. Only 14 have so far been recovered.

Police announced tonight that they wish to interview a man wearing high heels and frilly knickers
However ,the chief constable said they must wear their normal uniforms.

A ship carrying red paint collided with another one carrying purple paint.
Both crews are thought to be marooned!

There was a fire at the Inland Revenue office in London, but it was put out before any serious good was done.

In Hounslow this evening, a mad dog bit an income tax inspector.
After being given injections and treatment for shock, the dog has been allowed to go home.

The Prime Minister said today that the state of the economy was in no way connected to the arrest this morning on Dover beach of a large group of illegal immigrants who were trying to leave the country.

Comfortable in hospital tonight is the man who heeded the warning of the Ministry of Transport to wear something white at night.
He went out dressed in a white hat, white shoes and white trousers and was run over by a snow plough.

The world's greatest jigsaw puzzle designer was divorced today after his wife found he was keeping a piece on the side.

A man who swallowed 
5 worth of pennies was rushed to Southend hospital yesterday.
Doctors say he spent a quiet night and 43p. They don't expect any change tomorrow.

News of an unfortunate incident at a circus in York this evening: the management took action against the human cannonball and fired him. 
          They said his act was over the heads of the audience.

Nobody ever writes to me. I get letters from my mother addressed
      'To whom it may concern'.

Wednesday, 1 February 2017

Does Sean Spicer have any brains, or balls?


1.  If Mr Spicer had any brains he would know that a five year old  American citizen poses no threat to our national security.

2.  If he had any balls he would tell his bosses, Trump and Bannon that their new policy is just plain bad and wrong, and that no child should be detained away from her/his parent/s in a situation such as this.


The Republican Party claims to be the party of "Family Values".   Say what?


It is not abundantly clear whether or not this was the child who was handcuffed.  But I tell you this. If an American child was detained or handcuffed by the Government of another Nation, we would bomb the hell out of that Country.

Monday, 30 January 2017

What's in your way?

At the west end of our property (Glen Oaks Ridge) there is a bit of spare land, which separates us from the neighbouring Glen Oaks Manor.

We call it "no man's land", but in truth it belongs to us, The lore is that the City had once planned for this land to be an extension of a local road).

As it is, it is a semi wild buffer between the neighbourhoods.

We (Glen Oaks Ridge) used to have a fence which ran north and south of the above sign. We tore it down because it served no practical or aesthetically purpose.

There used to be a gap just to the south (left) of the sign - a way through for us and our neighbors

The fence is gone, the gap is no longer needed.

But Penne, (my dog) insists on walking to the left of the sign, as if the fence was still there.

Which leads me to ask, "are their barriers to our emotional and spiritual growth which used to be there, but which have long since disappeared?"

When that is the case, why do we live as if the barriers (fences) were still there?

I am reminded of the man (in his sixties)  who used to come to me for counseling. His narrative was unchanging:   all his problems were because of his father.

One day I could not hold myself back.  I YELLED (how unprofessional!)  "He is dead.  He can't do that anymore".

The man was a bit like Penne.   He was "seeing" a fence which was no longer there.

This leads me back to you (and to me) to the questions:

"are their barriers to our emotional and spiritual growth which used to be there, but which have long since disappeared?"

When that is the case, why do we live as if the barriers (fences) were still there?