There are two strains of old coot behavior: the Grumpy and the Daffy. I can be both.
For today I was clearly a daffy old coot. Utterly daffy!
I was at my barber shop - the one I have used for thirteen years. I opted to wait in for the owner (Patrick) even though his chair-rental barber was not busy.
The chair-rental barber began to speak to me. I responded as best I could, given that his voice was very soft.
In due course I asked him to speak up 'cause I could hardly hear what he was saying.
At which point Patrick and the man in his chair burst into laughter.
"He's not talking to you" Patrick said - "he is having a conversation with someone via his mobile 'phone".
I was exposed as a "daffy old coot", in public!
I could not restrain my laughter. You should also have a giggle about my daffy old coot-ness!